Transformation as a bereaved parent can be anxiety provoking. There is a tendency to cling to the familiarity of past or present pain. It is as if moving forward to another level will cause you to lose the memory of your child or worse dishonor his or her memory. Even take away whatever little peace you may have found. It is a conflict. No doubt about it. One I can relate to.
When I returned from the peace of visiting Spain. I started to have doubts about moving forward with my writing. I thought, I'll just write little stories for my own and family and friends' pleasure. I am going to give up this blogging and publication stuff. Too stressful. As you can see, I am back blogging. I am also exploring additional options for my books. I had all kinds of excuses to cocoon myself from fatigue to financial. I started a writing seminar which I was anxious about, but it proved to be the motivation I needed.
Transformation is another giant step and another decision on the journey of the grief process. Questions will arise. Can I really move on with my life? Do I want to move ahead? Is it the right thing to do?
Only you can answer these questions for yourself. Only you can decide your future direction. But I urge you to consider with faith, thought and courage, what your next steps might be. It would be very good to take back your own power from the enormity of the tragedy that has loomed over you. If you and I allow ourselves to become or remain victims of our tragic circumstances, this only compounds our losses.
Even if you don't feel like it today, you have survived. This signals you have the ability to be a vital force for the universal good starting today and for tomorrow. Perhaps your time has come to take back your life.