VIOLENCE UNCHECKED

In a season supposing to bring "peace on earth and good will to men" recent violent events depict anything but. A man sets fire to a woman on a subway car in a major city. An ideologic fanatic mows down New Years Eve revelers with a truck in a major city. A military vet, with unmet severe mental health issues, blows up himself and his truck  in front of a famous hotel in a city known for entertainment around the world. Hostages are still being held, under terrible conditions, in a war in the Middle East.

What is happening? First of all political incompetence and political corruption played a role in the loss of life in all these events.  The more things change, the more they stay the same. But all the deaths associated with these global events involve some parents' son or daughter.

So as we visit the Christ child in the manger, light the Menorah candles or cite the principles of Kwanza, let us not forget the pain of other parents as we recall our own losses. We all have our own anger and losses and, sadly, more parents are joining our ranks. 

There is no doubt that evil walks among us. Some of us have experienced it first hand. In my humble opinion, the only way to combat evil is prayer and good works. I know many of us are angry at God for the circumstances surrounding the deaths of our children. But this same God still loves us and we need Him to navigate and to survive our grief journeys. The alternative to asking for God's help is to remain embittered and angry. The choice is ours--to survive or just exist. 

My prayers and sincere condolences to any parent who has recently lost a child in what is supposed to be a season of joy, happiness and renewal, not burying your child. You can and will get through this heavy dark cloud of grief hanging over you. Your life will never be the same, but you can have a life of productivity instead of paralysis. 

Find a way to honor your child's life instead of a memorial at their place of death. Do not isolate. See small groups of trusted family and friends. And pray, pray, pray. Tell God how you are feeling. How you feel hopeless. Even how angry you are at Him. Cry. Punch pillows. Write a daily journal. Write a letter to your child and bury it at his or her gravesite. You can and will come out the other side of this blow. Do not give up. Get counseling. Take prescribed medication for anxiety or depression in the short term. There is hope. Do not give up.

Wishing you all hope, strength and peace in the coming days. Love, Rosemarie

If anyone is feeling hopeless and suicidal, call 911 or 988 in the US or got to your nearest hospital emergency room. There is no shame in asking for help in times of severe loss.

"Leave your troubles with the Lord, and He will defend you." Psalm 55: 22