"The road is long with many a winding turn..." comes from the song "He ain't heavy. He's my brother" written by Bob Russell and Bobby Scott and recorded by The Hollies. Those words best describes the journey we grieving parents must travel to move forward after losing our children. And yes, the road is long with many a winding turn as we carry the heavy burden of the loss of a child.
Unfortunately, there are many winding turns that can derail us while we're grieving. There is deep depression, separation and divorce, job loss, drugs, alcohol, promiscuity, pornography, domestic violence. Perhaps some of us have been around those turns. If so, get help. Fight back.
Remember he/she "ain't heavy." The spirits, the memories, the love of our deceased children live on in our own hearts and minds and in our own spirits. He or she is always with us. We will carry him or her for as long as we live, but they're "not heavy," they're our kids. Our kids who will always be with us in a different way. Not the way we would have chosen, but a way within us.
We, as bereaved parents, can travel this road to move forward to where the pain is not all encompassing. Let's make our kids proud. Honor their memories by not falling apart. Be strong. Do whatever it takes not to get sucked down the wrong turn. Individual grief counseling, a professionally run support group, prayer, faith, journaling, meditation, yoga, tai chi, but most of all determination to make it down the road in one piece. The choice to empower ourselves is ours.
"I am weak and poor; come to me quickly, O God. You are my savior and my Lord---hurry to my aid!" Psalm 70: 5
Love, peace, and strength to you all, Rosemarie
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